A letter to my soulmate

The soulmate subject keeps coming up over and over, from friends, family, my psychic my cards, my psychic is like "Maria he is already here and you know your destiny..." And all of this is enough to send me up to sit on the roof with a cigarette... well it's not that bad. But then people make me realize that I am afraid of a relationship or at least of losing the freedom I have had for so long. I see other people struggling and fighting and pretty much in bondage and I just can't deal with anything that is anything close to that. So my psychic asks me how I know it will be like that and I tell I don't but I fear ending up with the wrong one. But if he's your soulmate you will know Maria, and you do know it. She's right. But what if the one you know is him doesn't even talk to you. Maybe like he says, when the time is right. But it is just wierd. Becuz maybe it would be nice to at least get to know him better but then she reminds me that his and my path is unlike any others and there is danger in saying certain things in certain places. He said it too. So why do I feel so wierd? So my psychic asked me to write down what I would say to him. So here we go...

To My Soulmate.
I don't know if you are out there, I don't know if you are who I think you are. And if you are then I don't know if you know as I do or if you think I am a loon. But I guess whoever you are where ever you are we will one day know each other face to face and everything will happen as it should. Until then, what would I say to you? What would I want you to know? I guess that I would never do anything to hurt you, I would want us to have complete trust in each other, I would want us to be best friends and maybe lovers if it was meant to be that way, but if not best friends would be fine. I would want you to know that I would always be there to support you in what ever you do. I would walk through hell and back with you if I had too. I would want you to know that I've seen you in dreams since I was little and that I recognize your spirit from lifetimes past. I feel you and sense you and at times I probably sense what you are feeling because if you are my soulmate then we are like brother and sister kinda, but not, like we are angels, you have 1 wing, I have the other and neither is complete till we are together. I would tell you not to be afraid of my friendship, I am not a jealous person who tries to tie someone down, I do not expect someone to pay attention to me all the time, or to be by my side every moment. I would hope that you are a writer, artist, musician of some sort like me who understands what it is like to need time to write and create. I would hope that both the things we have in common and things that are opposites would complement each other. If we ever disagreed I would want us to work it out and talk not keep silent. I would want you to be able to learn to love fully and freely without holding back and be passionate about life and what you do in life as well as things we do together.

You know, I don't know exactly what type of relationship we will have, but if you are out there, don't be afraid to let me know.

There is more I could say but I will wait till one day when we meet face to face.
Anyway, I've written it. It is done. He will never read it, but that's not the point of writing it. The point is that when you write things they have a way of manifesting in some way or another.

So yeah, no matter what I say or appear to feel. I really do care about this person but there is no point in dwelling on it or thinking about it until he knows who I am, until we meet. But since the subject pops up everywhere and I promised I'd write about it here it is.

That said, I just want to share somethigncute then I am out... got house cleanin to do, and it includes a kitten with the runs! Woo Hoo! Uck!!!

So my daughter Erin comes in to the house and says, "Mom you are good at sewing, can you sew up Alex's eyebrow?" Alex was in that fight I wrote about yesterday. I told them both he needs to go to the clinic up the street or the emergency room, I can't give stitches, it would just be wierd, and not sanitary. Not to mention painful for Alex and horrifying for me. It's not the same as doing piercings. Not for me anyway. One day I will write about Erins piercing and hair clinic. It was something!!! lol!!!

Ok, I am out, cat diarrea awaits, ugh!!!
Hugs, and Kisses,
Maria